Clarinet Pick Up Lines

Happy Valentine’s Day! 

Here are some clari-nerdy pick up lines guaranteed to garner the love of that special someone!

  • Are you the Kell 17 Staccato Studies? Because you’ve got me tongue-tied!
  • Are you the first movement of the Copland concerto? Because you take my breath away!
  • Are you the Nielsen concerto? Because you make my heart beat faster!
  • Are you Benny Goodman? Because you make me want to sing, sing, sing!
  • Are you a Stravinsky polyrhythm? Because you’re hard to follow!
  • Are you a Brahms sonata? Because I can’t get enough of you!
  • Are you the Mendelssohn Scherzo? Because I always make a fool of myself around you!
  • Are you a handwritten manuscript? Because you’re hard to read!
  • Are you the Mozart manuscript? Because you’re one of a kind!

And a few poems if you’re not feeling the love this Valentine’s Day:

Today is a joke,
I’ve got my rosé;
I’d rather spend time
practicing Klosé.

Roses are red
and so is my heart;
Time to go practice
the concerto of Mozart!

I’m sitting in bed,
watching rom-coms,
Eating some chocolate
and dreaming of Brahms.

I finally give up,
after the hours I dwelled;
Practicing long tones
to sound like Mühlfeld.

Roses are red
You set my heart on fire
My love for you
is greater than Sabine Meyer.

Roses have thorns,
Why must love hurt?
I’d rather spend
time with Schubert.

K. 622 is the best,
I love it with all my heart;
Nothing will ever compare
to my love for Mozart.

Messiaen is the best,
I wish he was mine;
Until then, I’ll just play
the Quartet for the End of Time.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Comment below with your nerdiest clarinet or musical pick up line!


  • Dan

    Girls usually run away from me before I can even try to use a pickup line, but let’s make something up…

    You are as sweet as a fresh reed.
    You are as sharp as the fork Eb/Bb.

    One that has a chance to work: want a free recork/repad/overhaul?

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